Come on over

A few nights ago, my friend and I were doing this mental exercise. I find it to be a motivational tool especially when I find myself floundering. The whole principle of the exercise is to help you figure out what you want out of life, where you want to be, etc.
It's starts off with the place you live in, the color of the walls, the things you have in each room.

One thing that I like to do is figure out who comes to visit me, who calls me, whether or not I live alone. I've started to wonder about how much this says about the people I value and who I feel values me.

Back home over the winter I got to see two of my friends who because of circumstance I am rarely able to get in contact with. However in each relationship we make the effort to find sometime to get together, whether it be for coffee, dinner, wandering around the mall...if there's a minute of time we'll find a way to squeeze the other in. When I am with them I feel like a better person, they have such a radiant energy around them that it's hard to feel blue in their presence. I think chilling with them made me realize what I want to change about the friendships I have at the moment.

I have good friends, I am lucky that the ones who know me best, know that I value them. They know me inside and out, and have for years. They've seen me cry or have commented on my lj when I thought no one would listen. They were with me in high school, they're my movie buddies. They know what I let slide and what I do not stand for. They know my skills and my weaknesses and they know that I'm aware of them as well.

In my mind, I see those people in my house. I see myself having them over for Sunday brunch in the backyard, or maybe one or two of them over for a movie and Junk food.

I suppose all that matters is that I know who they are, and they know that I feel like that about them. The rest, whatever their ideas might be, will find out soon enough.